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Wife. Mommy. Lover of cookies.

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RT @HonestToddler: Toddler Tip: She has a bounty of nerves underneath that "last" one. Don't worry :)

Archive: December 2005

But I Have a Good Reason

So, someone said that I need to blog more often. True enough. Does it make it any better if I say that my computer was in the hospital for a week? I don’t have any of my settings saved on any other computer (well, I do now, since Kevin backed everything up for me last night), so I couldn’t log into anything, including MT. I honestly don’t know any of my passwords or logins for anything. Thankfully, my little Mac was returned to the Genius Bar with all of my information still intact. I don’t have the slightest clue what I would have done if I had to re-register at every single site I visit. That would suck.

I sincerely hope everyone had a wonderful holiday, and I’ll catch up sooner rather than later, I promise. But, hey. I work retail, and I’m trying to recover. (See, C? I had to get it in!) 😉

Horrible Confession

On my way home today, I heard the Christmastime in Africa song. You know, the one from the 80’s by Band Aid? Okay. So here’s the deal (and Kevin and J&C know what’s coming).
When I was a kid (when the song first came out, in like, 1984), Ethiopia was big news. This was before Sally Struthers came and ate all the Twinkies. There were pictures all over the TV every day of these poor little kids with distended bellies and flies all over them, and, obviously, it made my 9 year old heart very sad. Imagine my further distress when I heard the Band Aid song for the first time. The trouble is, I heard the lyrics wrong. You know the part where they say “Do they know it’s Christmastime at all?” That part was okay. But what really got me was the part where they sang “The only gift they’ll get this year is life”. The only thing is, I heard it “The only gift they’ll get this year is lice” (cut to images of Sally Struthers with the kids with big bellies and flies). I remember being so distraught over that as a child, and it wasn’t until years later (in high school), that I learned the real words.
Here’s my dilemma: You can never un-learn the orignal way you heard something. So, even though it’s wildly inappropriate, I found myself giggling today as that song played on the radio. Don’t get me wrong; I was laughing more at myself than the poor little kids, but some images stay in your head forever, and damn. In retrospect, it is kinda funny.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go reserve my condo by the Lake of Fire in the pits of hell.


What’s the worst thing that could happen to me, but the best thing that could happen to my husband? That’s right. I’ve completely lost my voice. Trust me when I tell you that this is the very worst thing that could happen to somebody who talks as much as me. The good news? I feel totally fine. Too bad I can’t tell anyone.

Do I Offend?

What could I have possibly done to all the bacteria in the world for them to mount an all-out assault on my poor body? I swear to everything holy that this is the absolute longest that I’ve ever been sick. We’re going on damn near a week. Last night, much to my (and my husband’s) delight, the little bugs decided to take up residence in my chest, so neither Kev nor I got any sleep. I went from sounding like a flock of geese to sounding like a….well, like I was hacking up a lung or two. Dear Lord! Will this ever end?

Damn Bugs

Lemme check. Yep. Still sick. Dammit. It’s like I have concrete in my sinuses. Like 1,000,000 tiny flies are dancing in my throat. I’ve tried sooooo hard not to take any Heart Attack in a Bottle pills today, but I’m about to have to give in. Mucinex just isn’t bulldozing through my sinus cavities enough to give me any relief. I sound like an enitre flock of Canadian geese. I bet the husband can’t wait to crawl into bed with his snotty wife tonight. Damn, I’m glamorous.

So Bad, But It Feels Sooooo Good

Everybody knows that decongestants are bad for you. Especially if you have heart problems. But I finally broke down (in the interest of my own sanity) and loaded up on Sudafed Extreme Cold and Allergy Ass Kicker. I’m pretty sure that’s what it was called. Lo and behold, I can breathe. It’s a Christmas miracle!




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